Purse Wars

I decided to do it. Yes, IT. The thing us women all hate. No, not that...no, not that either.

I cleaned out my purse.

I inspired Larkin to THINK about doing the same, but I made her make a list of what was in her purse.

Me first, but let it be known, mine isn't NEAR as interesting as Larkins:

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1 Samsung Standard Battery Type 3.7V Li-ion – found on the floor of a bar. (Note: the next week I found ANOTHER Samsung battery on the floor of a different bar, kept that too, but it is on my nightstand.) (NOTE# 2: I do not have any devices that these batteries will fit)

7 pennies and 1 dime

Lots of tobacco that has fallen loose out of my cigarette packs

1 Ipod

3 packs of cigarettes. Two open, one sealed. Two packs of shorts, one pack 100’s.

My keys

1 key of unknown origin

3 Important tax documents (at least that is what it says on the envelope)

Two paystubs

Two cards from Andrew Black whom I met at Blaine’s last week. Apparently he is a real estate agent.

One appointment card for a follow up with the gyno on February 24, 2009 at 1:15pm.

My Implanon calendar

Four invitations to the Karaoke Massacre on Valentines Day. This is hosted by the Savannah Derby Devils. Yes, I am going to watch roller derby.

One $5 Jumbo Bucks in which I won $4.

A zippo

Some Altoids

Lip gloss

Chapstick

One set of hoop earrings

Three pens

Two checkbooks

and some Afrin.


And now for Larkin's list (w/ commentary provided by yours truly. It is my blog ya know.)

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3 miller lite bottle tops (Drunk ass)

1 quarter (Probably the one I gave you last week isn't it?!?)

Stolen carabba’s mints (approx 15) (I was there when you thefted those you damn thief!)

Camera (How we remember our nights out on the town)

Wallet (Strange item to have in a purse don't you think?)

2 tubes of mascara (For those beautiful eyes!)

2 post-it pads (Stolen from work no doubt!)

3 unopened bottles of insulin (Heroin)

1 bag syringes (See, told you she was a heroin addict)

2 tootsie pops (Stolen from work...AGAIN)

1 necklace (Lotta good it does in your purse, tard)

1 hair band (For what hair? You just cut that shit off!)

Hand lotion (For all the hand jobs you give out, Hooker cheese)

Body spray (To freshin up after working the street all morning)

1 coozie (Did you steal that from me?)

1 handkerchief (Unsanitary)

1 dog collar (No dog attached I hope)

1 bottle of perfume (Again, when you are a slut bucket, you gotta get that hooker skank off ya)

1 hair clip (Again...really, what hair?)

2 blood checker thingys (Cover up for the heroine addiction)

1 bad ass pocket knife (To cut a fool. She gangsta)

Several paperclips (Stolen, again, from work)

Several lip stuffs (lip gloss, chap stick, lip stick, etc.) (How many lips do you have?)

1 liquid eyeliner (Stuff makes my eyes burn)

1 york peppermint paddy chapstick (You let me try that the other day...pretty good!)

Various receipts, wrappers, papers (Gahh, so messy)

1 spoon (Really?)

1 flattened fork (ok, I took the fork out last week, but it was too cool to not mention) (LMAO...I remember this flat fork you speak of...didn't you find that in the road one morning?)