Drugs Are Bad, Kids.

I have a friend, who shall remain nameless so as to protect the guilty, whose company just recently hired on someone to help at their office.

List of issues that have happened since the new hire came on 17 days ago:

Day 1 & 2, (Wednesday & Thursday) shows up on time, everything is great.

Day 3 (Friday), she doesn't show up, doesn't call until 3.5 hours later and states her mom has been in a car accident and her phone was dead.

Day 4 (Monday) - She shows up on time, apologizes again for being gone Friday

Day 5 (Tuesday) - She shows up 25 minutes late. Says lots of school traffic.

Day 6 (Wednesday) - Shows up 30 minutes late. Says she had a flat tire.

Day 7 (Thursday) - 35 minutes late. Says her boyfriend went to the hospital for having a seizure the night before. He has no history of seizures (weird). Also, boyfriend's mom was in accident and at the hospital at the same time her boyfriend was and didn't get home until 4 a.m. Friday morning. The boss man had a talk with her, during which she admits it all sounded like a bunch of bull shit, but claims it really is just bad luck.

Days 8 -14 – On time, no problems

Day 15 (Tuesday) - 35 minutes late. Claims boyfriend worked late and drives her car and was unable to get back in time for her to leave for work.

Day 16 (Wednesday) - On time.

TODAY:

Day 17 (Thursday) - 10 minutes late. Comes in hysterical and crying saying she is having panic attack. Asks to keep her really busy with work and then goes into the front office to locate some files.

Within minutes falls asleep on the floor in the credenza cabinet. Boss man and co-worker can't wake her up so they call her mom, who is the emergency contact, whom she wakes up to speak to in slurred speech.

Face. Mother. Fucking. First. Into The. File.

Please see video for how hard this chick was sleeping.

Following this little chit chat with mom, she sends boss IM saying "I'm completely embarrassed and extremely hungry" and then goes back in to front office and tries to call boyfriend to pick her up. She falls asleep in the credenza AGAIN, with the cordless phone, which she leaves on and on the floor. Phone dies.

No file support on this one, just straight up fell OUT.

Customer walks in and hears her in the office snoring, asks if she is okay. Her mom calls to check on her, she wakes up. She goes back to her actual desk and cries and may have fallen asleep again.

Claims she didn't take anything for panic attack.

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So TODAY’S issue…taking too many pills and having a hard time not falling asleep in the credenza.

Seriously. How hard is it to show up to work…and work?!

You guys know how I love me a good time…and I can count on ONE HAND how many times I have missed work in SIX YEARS for ANYTHING. That includes being sick, hangovers and general “I don’t want to work today blahs”.

All that being said, I must applaud un-named friend for capturing these candid shots of soon to be fired newly hired person. This has been the source of MUCH entertainment today!